Baby Diary Week 6

August 6, 2012

Hey Blueberry-

Your mother (me) just had one of the most difficult weekends ever. I went on a girls weekend style trip for a bridal shower and keeping you a secret was incredibly difficult. In fact, I'm really not sure if you still are a secret, although only one person was directly notified. Not counting the waitress and bartender who needed to know.

Last week, just after we found out about you, I went on another girls weekend style trip for my high school reunion. It just so happened that one of your Aunts needed to spill the beans on the bun in her oven at the same time, so we were able to surprise all of our friends together. It was one of the best moments (that happened 3 different times) I've had spreading the news about you. The only drawback was the conversation that weekend was completely centered around motherhood and the thought of you still hadn't settled in yet. In fact, I'm not sure if it has yet, but the longer I wait the more real you become.

The trip this weekend was with another group of friends and one of our favorite activities to do together is spend time together enjoying adult beverages. Which you will not have until you are in college! I'd like to highlight 4 of the hardest moments for me:

1. The group decides to make margaritas and sunbathe. There's literally no way for me to get a fake-looking beverage without being awkward and obvious so I accept the (luckily extremely watered down) margarita and mostly just let it sit there and melt. Everyone else guzzles theirs down, then continue with beer and pina coladas. I just say, 'I'm good!' and get weird looks.

2. At dinner, I ask the waitress for a vodka press, and so does another friend. Then I excuse myself to 'use the restroom', corner the waitress in the crowded, smoky bar filled with drunk people and explain the situation. I ask her to just make it look like a drink but it can just be sprite with lime or whatever. I get back to the table feeling satisfied, and the real vodka press has been served in a tiny plastic cup. Next thing I know, the waitress comes up with a huge styrafoam cup and plops it in front of me. The questions immediately start "What's that?" "What did you order?" "I thought you got a vodka press?" "What did she bring you?" I clammed up and said, "I'm not sure what she brought, it takes like straight sprite." Waitress is flagged down by friends and I ask for a vodka press. Luckily she brings me water with a lime in the correct tiny plastic cup. Thanks for nothing lady!

3. At the bar after dinner, they are known for something called a Bushwacker. First of all, it's something I'd never drink- it contains heavy cream and something gross called tequila rose. Four of them are ordered and passed around. Again, no way to avoid taking one (just like the margaritas) without being weird. So I pretended to sip it a couple of times and eventually said I wanted something else. Ordered my fake vodka press again (and here comes the huge styrafoam cup again!) and it seemed to work out ok. Still akward. Then the friends thought it would be funny- they are all drunk at this point- to start grabbing, pinching, and cupping my boobs. I guess their new size is just irresistable. Have I mentioned that they really hurt most of the time? Looking forward to payback on that one!

4. The next morning, friend looks at my phone for the time. No big deal. Until I check the time and see a dumb pregnancy tracker notification popped up on my screen! I didn't even think I signed up for those. It clearly said, 'Your baby is 6 weeks old today...blah blah blah....' So I had to confront it and she said she saw there was a text but she didn't read it, but why, is there something I need to tell her? Still not sure if the news is out by that, but I did my best to backtrack.

All I know now is you are tiny and starting to make me feel pretty crappy. Not just tired, but I just threw up in my mouth a little bit, and the idea of most foods that aren't in a box gross me out. The only appealing foods are velveeta shells & cheese (which I had for dinner, but if I barf, that might change), cereal, popcorn, and pasta. I know I need fruits and veggies but they are too much work and I'm eating so often to avoid feeling queasy. I almost blacked out at work earlier because we were so busy I was running around for a few hours straight and didn't have time to even drink water. So far the grossest foods are: wet eggs, chicken, steak, slimy pork, wet fish, fake margaritas, tuna, and salad. Seriously, just reading that list makes me want to hurl.

The weirdest craving has been jelly beans. The worst part other than forgetting every other thing I need to rememer and feeling off balance are the headaches- just dull enough to notice but not something I'd ever take medicine for. Also the burping. It's constant.

Only a couple more weeks until we go to the doctor and then get to spread the news about you to even more family and friends! I don't anticipate many more akward moments around avoiding alcohol before the biggest surprise reveal we have planned, in just a few weeks at your dad's 30th birthday party. We want to visit the midwife before telling anyone else and make sure everything is ok. And then I can let these secret blog posts go too!