Main Entry: soul mate

Function: noun

Date: 1822

1 : a person who is perfectly suited to another in temperament 2 : a person who strongly resembles another in attitudes or beliefs

I've never really believed in soul mates because they are usually referred to as romantic partners and I don't think most people have only one person they could possibly ever be in a lasting relationship with- I think there are options that change with time (see my dad as an example). That's not to say that nobody ever marries their soul mate, that obviously happens too. 

I also didn't think that I would allow anyone to be close enough to be a soul mate.

But what if it's something that is just there- it just happens and you don't realize it until its gone?

Can you tell by the way you feel? Like you are literally broken in two? Or shattered into a million tiny fragments held together by fine, breakable thread?

Is it the conversations in your head, the ones you would have said out loud, the ones that would have an actual resolution?

Or is it all of the past shared experiences, the inside jokes or repeated questions, the 'remember when...'?

Is it the knowledge that this one person will always understand how you feel and will be feeling the same way- fight your battles, take your side, and always want the same pizza toppings and laugh at the same dumb stuff?

Is it the future that always had them in it?

And then when it doesn't, and you look back at pictures and realize the farther back you look, the happier you feel... What do you do then?

When half of your soul is gone, how do you survive?

How do you live and be happy when you are left alone?

How in the world do you play with raw pizza dough in a public restaurant for an hour and not get embarrassed if there's not your soul mate doing it with you?